tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post8999373008662110177..comments2023-11-02T07:53:45.876-07:00Comments on Girl's Gone Child: teach a child to fishGIRL'S GONE CHILDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07130764109593048451noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-11137849556723269952011-02-16T08:20:27.781-08:002011-02-16T08:20:27.781-08:00Incredible post. Thank you for sharing and for rem...Incredible post. Thank you for sharing and for reminding me.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00633953352069391552noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-32403987333812871932011-02-16T07:50:31.441-08:002011-02-16T07:50:31.441-08:00Every parent wants their kids to have a better lif...Every parent wants their kids to have a better life than they did. The early teen years somehow leaves us all a little screwed up, but those days and crappy feelings (going on 15 years ago now) are still right with me today. <br />I know that happy mamas breed happy babies, and 2011 is my year to get happy. <br />Your post was well-timed for me. Thank you for being relevant.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-70338518724574562552010-12-21T08:08:16.206-08:002010-12-21T08:08:16.206-08:00Awesome post! I've finally jumped on my Mommy ...Awesome post! I've finally jumped on my Mommy Blog train, reading others, writing my own. I truly, truly enjoy yours. I love this post as I am mama to a 7, 6, and 4 year old. Self love, confidence, and a creative place of their own to retreat to in the rain.<br />Thank you for sharing!Breezehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03776534982261847155noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-31362517290181877492010-11-18T11:45:29.581-08:002010-11-18T11:45:29.581-08:00"Present/Infant" by Ani Difranco - you w..."Present/Infant" by Ani Difranco - you will love it.<br /><br />Here's a link:<br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuvwMYUFLTsMelissanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-10341600480403811682010-11-18T08:15:20.662-08:002010-11-18T08:15:20.662-08:00You were always a gifted writer, Rebecca! Loved th...You were always a gifted writer, Rebecca! Loved this post.Loukiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03066879990007701379noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-81385833932766617272010-11-17T20:58:38.648-08:002010-11-17T20:58:38.648-08:00This is such an amazing entry, Rebecca. Everyone i...This is such an amazing entry, Rebecca. Everyone in the internet world needs to read it.<br /><br />The shitty thing about bullying is that it should NOT exist. I mean, I know you're thinking, "Well obviously." But what I mean is that everyone's going through the same thing. The truth is that your teenage years are painful years...no matter if you planned it out like that, or if it just happened. I think it's just inevitable. Pain is here to grant all of us a visit. It's how we choose to personify it that makes all the difference. Almost all teenagers are sad, hurt and lonely. Almost all teenagers feel worthless at one point, ugly, stupid…Alone.<br /><br />I think the problem is we live in a world where you have to be okay all the time. Or at least pretend to be. So a person has all this pent up anger and he/she uses that rage in the form of bullying. Of course it's not right, but we're taught that everything's supposed to be picture-perfect; picture perfect to the outside world. When we're home it's another story. But outside in school: Everything has to be fine. You put on a smile. You laugh. <br /><br />When in the end: a lot of people just want to cry (from going through a shitty day before, week before, month before, year before). But it’s hard to talk about feelings, so in order to feel better people mock other’s to feel better.<br /><br />But it’s a dangerous thing, this bullying. And it makes my heart ache to think of those who have taken their life because of it.<br /><br />Fable & Archer are lucky to have you, because you will prevent it by teaching them the right way; by loving yourself. And hopefully as you’ve written: all the people who come into their lives will know the right way as well. Through Archer & Fable.Rayhttp://www.xanga.com/yourfavoritecynicnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-35677137111496601652010-11-17T08:00:56.779-08:002010-11-17T08:00:56.779-08:00hooray tenth grade you.hooray tenth grade you.Sarah Buttenwieserhttp://www.valleyadvocate.com/blogs/home.cfm?uid=92noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-28916047162494588992010-11-16T10:49:08.159-08:002010-11-16T10:49:08.159-08:00Great post! Growing up my mother instilled beauty ...Great post! Growing up my mother instilled beauty comes from within. We have to love ourselves no matter what. Not everyone is going to like us. She raised me to be very confident, and because of that most people thought I was stuck up. Same thing has happened to my daughter, but I raised her to be a confident young lady as well. She loves herself and learned to never change her ways, whether it's her fashion sense etc just to fit in. She learned to be a leader and not a follow. When she's all dressed up she looks in the mirror and says damn I look good, she's not waiting for anyone else to acknowledge her or compliment her. <br /><br />I always raised her to treat people the way you'd like to be treated. <br /><br />Thanks for sharing your journals. Even then you wrote beautifully. Love the pictures. You ROCK!Glendanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-6217425600386486502010-11-16T08:46:17.612-08:002010-11-16T08:46:17.612-08:00What you said in the video, Rebecca, about teachin...What you said in the video, Rebecca, about teaching Archer that the most important thing he can be is kind, is also so so so important. We spend so much time as parents worrying that our children will be bullied and building up their defenses against it. But it's not always the self-haters who are bullies--all children are susceptible to doing it and it's equally important that we emphasize how unacceptable it is to be ever be cruel and how important it is to NOT go along with the gang at someone else's expense (of course, self-confidence makes this possible).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-36850567288270067412010-11-15T19:10:12.345-08:002010-11-15T19:10:12.345-08:00I read your post and thought of this: http://www.y...I read your post and thought of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QH4lyJWa_84<br /><br />Thanks for the wonderful post!Rosenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-23311076994251489922010-11-14T22:22:21.875-08:002010-11-14T22:22:21.875-08:00can you imagine a world where every child's pa...can you imagine a world where every child's parents taught them that being kind was the most important thing to be? ah, what a great place that would be for all of us to live in. <br /><br />thank you ggc for being a parent a non-parent can look up to and aspire to be one day.MAVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14290087631538674134noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-28927006629911573332010-11-14T22:15:48.373-08:002010-11-14T22:15:48.373-08:00Been reading your blog for a while, but haven'...Been reading your blog for a while, but haven't posted until now.<br /><br />I LOVED this post. Reminded me that regularly asking my daughter what she thinks of herself is as good an idea as I think it is.<br /><br />I always think my 5 year old Maci is immune from bullying because she's so awesome, but then I remember that she was a superhero version of herself for Halloween & then asked me if she can put 3-hole-punchers in the loot bags for her birthday party... so that oddness might not be considered so cute by her classmates when she grows up.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-79000356324725718412010-11-14T14:02:15.443-08:002010-11-14T14:02:15.443-08:00Yes! I think about this often for my 19 month old...Yes! I think about this often for my 19 month old daughter and I am with you! I love hearing her say "yes" when I ask if she is beautiful, brave, funny, happy...Margienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-37963149756870084152010-11-13T15:44:39.225-08:002010-11-13T15:44:39.225-08:00Sigh. I live in a world completely consumed by se...Sigh. I live in a world completely consumed by self doubt, which easily turns into self loathing. I don't know where to find the tools to change that though.<br /><br />Pathetic? Just a little bit.Olivia Singletonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04150670013691126285noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-76730875042774805112010-11-13T10:58:44.528-08:002010-11-13T10:58:44.528-08:00Beautiful message and one I hope I can pass on. I...Beautiful message and one I hope I can pass on. I will have my first son in less than 5 months and I hope that I can do this for my little guy too. <br /><br />I think it is interesting how you teased out the self-loathing as the underlying problem. Bullying has always been a problem but its impact seems so much more forceful lately. <br /><br />Thank you!Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04752095463109465222noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-51840482014876311552010-11-13T08:50:28.908-08:002010-11-13T08:50:28.908-08:00As a mother of a 4 year old little girl, I so need...As a mother of a 4 year old little girl, I so needed to read this. Not only for her....but for me....<br /><br />Thank youMiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15541671283329492072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-91843826980346231132010-11-12T23:34:26.568-08:002010-11-12T23:34:26.568-08:00Mrs Gryphon - I love you. And yes. Yes, yes YES. M...Mrs Gryphon - I love you. And yes. Yes, yes YES. My mom was the same way - we never even had a scale in our house growing up. Never saw my mom diet nor did I hear her talk about dieting ever. In fact, I don't know that my mother has ever been on a diet. <br /><br />Anyway, YES. <br /><br />And thank you - ALL OF YOU - for your words and for sharing your stories. I want to bring it all in for a group hug. <br /><br />And Linley? Thank you for commenting, for reading, for being amazing. Keep kicking ass, girl. xoGIRL'S GONE CHILDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07130764109593048451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-46945694443720976282010-11-12T23:26:42.215-08:002010-11-12T23:26:42.215-08:00I finally had a chance to sit down and read this t...I finally had a chance to sit down and read this tonight (several times, actually) and, once again, you've said everything I'm thinking but much more eloquently than I could!<br /><br />I love the idea of "helping them build their own shields". I've often wondered how I managed to have such a tough shield. I was picked on in high school (although not as seriously as you were, Rebecca, or some of the other commenters), and I still have my notebook of awful cringe-worthy poetry. Somehow, though, I came out of elementary/high school with my confidence and self-esteem intact.<br /><br />The problem now, is to figure out how to instill that same confidence in my awesome, strong-willed little girls. I think a lot of it has to do with teaching them to follow their instincts - so many of the crummy things that have happened to me in my life came from trusting someone that I shouldn't have, or not believing that I was worthy of anything better than a "friend" who acted anything but friendly. I hope that we can help them hone those instincts so that they'll stay away from the inevitable "toxic" people in their lives.<br /><br />In terms of building their confidence, I think that parents are the first line of defense. Kids hear everything, so we try to make sure they hear us telling our friends and family about their great qualities, not (only) complaining about how they make us crazy ;) Helping them follow their interests and encouraging their talents, as well as making sure they try new things and can accept not being the best at everything, are all things that my parents did, even though I never noticed it at the time.<br /><br />I also have to say that I don't remember my mom ever (not once!) mentioning her weight or a diet or how she wished she looked different. I think that was HUGE for me - not accepting who I was wasn't even an option. Bless her for that, and as a result, we try to never discuss weight or diets and to celebrate the unique beauty in everyone.<br /><br />Okay, enough rambling. Thanks for the very thought-provoking chat on Twitter and for this post, Rebecca. I happen to think that you fucking rule ;)Mrsgryphonhttp://Www.daysinbetween.canoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-39846342575379641562010-11-12T15:47:07.105-08:002010-11-12T15:47:07.105-08:00and we need to set the example by loving ourselves...and we need to set the example by loving ourselves first. by not complaining about how fat we are or how we can't wear this shirt or those pants. about how we need makeup to hide this or cover that. we can compliment them all we want but they need to see us compliment ourselves before they will learn to compliment themselves.jaidennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-60729962231216436052010-11-12T15:30:31.848-08:002010-11-12T15:30:31.848-08:00This is awesome. Thanks for writing/speaking about...This is awesome. Thanks for writing/speaking about it.<br /><br />As an aside: all the respect in the world to her but I find it a bit funny that I never ever everrrrr share Jessica's POV on these videos. I guess that's the purpose of having so many different voices.KHnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-77526265807888508562010-11-12T14:37:15.318-08:002010-11-12T14:37:15.318-08:00I absolutely loved this-- every, every word. You a...I absolutely loved this-- every, every word. You are and apparently always have been an utterly amazing writer!Catenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-91257203751136763142010-11-12T13:05:58.079-08:002010-11-12T13:05:58.079-08:00So true-- all of it. I'm probably one of your ...So true-- all of it. I'm probably one of your youngest readers (16), but I love finding the insight and connection from blogs of older generations (not to make you feel old)! You've contributed to to this huge sense of importance for doing what I love with my life, and being confident in doing so. Thanks for the example. :)Linleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04997298187291614943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-60718791330228814872010-11-12T11:30:40.961-08:002010-11-12T11:30:40.961-08:00I loved the post, but reading the journal really m...I loved the post, but reading the journal really made me sad and feel a little bit like the whole thing is hopeless. The pain in your writing is so evident, but where did it come from? Your mom seems absolutely amazing, and I'm sure she did all of the things for you that you are doing for Fable, but you still had that pain. Even with amazing parents, we still live in a society that makes it very difficult for women to love themselves. Sad. I'm glad you're aware of this and making it a priority with both kiddos.<br /><br />P.S. Last night I dreamt that I was in L.A. so I stopped by your house and you schooled me in fashion. If only it weren't a dream.... :)Adriannehttp://chasingfulfillment.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-7219126188906401832010-11-12T11:16:06.910-08:002010-11-12T11:16:06.910-08:00I love this so much my heart swells up and hurts. ...I love this so much my heart swells up and hurts. My daughter is 18 months old (today!), and I can't tell her enough how smart, how beautiful, how wonderful she is. I need to teach her to tell me the same about herself. Love.Mariannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06733104020381620860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18751784.post-13903519011230708072010-11-12T10:43:04.758-08:002010-11-12T10:43:04.758-08:00You guys are AMAZING. Thank you for your comments....You guys are AMAZING. Thank you for your comments. And this, Sarah:<br /><br />" ...it was my job to be nice to him. Because people who tease are sad and they don't love themselves like I did. So I was to tell Ryan I was sorry he was sad and I could help him like himself more, if he wanted my help. Ryan never teased me again.<br /><br />The world really would be a better place if we all took care of each other a little more."<br /><br />... EXACTLY. Such a perfect example that love prevails.GIRL'S GONE CHILDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07130764109593048451noreply@blogger.com