Boy Talk

A few weeks ago I wrote about periods and puberty as it relates to girls and young women and several parents inquired as to what body books were recommended for pre-pubescent (and pre-pre-pre pubescent) boys.

I will be perfectly honest. I had no experience with books on puberty for boys, but I started to think, "Hmmmm... I should know this. I should know which books to recommend AND I should have some of these books at home probably. Maybe? Is it too late?"

I am not a books-as-resource person, usually, but after looking through Fable's American Girl Body Book I realized how important it is for children to have books and material THEY can study on their own time. Sometimes a kid doesn't want to talk to her mom about all of the things and that's perfectly okay. I'm never going to force a conversation with my kids. Consent works in all directions.

That said, there is a reason I wrote a "period piece" and not a testicle tale. I am a woman and I have no experience in a male body. And while some men/dads/male caretakers are really into sitting down and having all the talks with their sons, many are... not. Vulnerability is not something men were typically raised to be praised for back in the day, you know what I mean? P.S. Here is a GREAT guide re: talking to sons about sex/sexuality.

ED: Last night, I told Archer I was working on a post about puberty and boys and I asked him what he thought boys would prefer when it came time for their parents to have "the talk" with them:

1. To be given books to look at themselves and ask questions later.
2. To talk about puberty/sex stuff in a casual way with their parents/caretakers (which is what we do now)
3. To wait until the teacher brought it up during sex-ed.

His answer was 2.

I was surprised and then I wasn't... We have been talking about bodies and puberty and periods and semen and pubes and all of the things since he (and everyone else) was a toddler. When you raise children with open conversation as it pertains to body changes, sexuality et al, shame kind of goes out the window. (For now, anyway.)

And yet, for some parents its very difficult to go there. (I feel like this is one of those times where your upbringing plays a HUGE part in the way you raise your kids. I have several friends who were raised in super religious households where masturbation was a sin and nobody so much as SPOKE of sex as it pertained to anyone who wasn't married and I know how much of a struggle these conversations are for them.)

Which is why books written specifically for pre/pubescent boys can be super helpful when it comes to all this stuff. Because it's inevitable, folks. Your tiny baby will soon be a young man. And it will have been your job to equip him with the knowledge and resources to navigate his adolescence. Because if you don't? His friends at school, the movies he watches, porn he downloads, will. 

You can read my entire post, here...