talkin' bout my procreation(s)

Archer kisses Fable's hand. Nana's garden, Easter

Want to hear something weird? I enjoy talking about my kids.

Crazy, right? You're probably so totally surprised to hear this news but it's true. I'm completely batty-obsessed with my kids. I'm totally dead serious when I say that I absolutely believe my kids will change the world. Totally convinced. Or conquer war, disease, become superheroes with magic powers -- that the sun will shine out of their asses and the whole world will gather to sunbathe in their .... ass... sun... shine. Or something.

I mean... Seriously.



You don't think so?

You think I should shut up?

You don't want to hear me talk incessantly about all the crazy, amazing shit my kids did today? What about yesterday? How about the day before? Don't you want to hear every detail of every mundane moment, milestone, diaper change?

You don't?

Oh, right.

I knew that.


Today* on Momversation we're talking about talking about our kids and what the hell our problem is that we I can't shut up about how smart Archer is and how sweet Fable is and blah blah this that and the other thing and aren't our kids so awesome and they're just total geniuses it's so great and fabulous and we're so lucky how about we go have coffee and talk for three hours about our kids because that's what parents do because we can't help it and we really need help.

Seriously, you guys. We need to stop with the babytalk 24/7 because MOM JEANS ALERT! We're annoying our friends and colleagues and selling ourselves short. Because we're perfectly capable of intellectual conversation.... The problem is? Sometimes it slips our mind to go there.

Because Archer IS smart and Fable's IS sweet and it's hard to keep it a secret. Even though I'm constantly reminding myself that no one really cares. No one who isn't immediate family anyway.

And yet, not talking about my kids? Is like trying not to fart after eating Mexican food for four days straight. Impossible. As impossible as it is trying to hold in a story or a milestone or an "omg, Archer did the CUTEST thing today omg."

But you knew that.

It's not like I'm blogging about horses, here.


*super cute flower headband in Momversation c/o Etsy store, eighty8.
**super cute flower children c/o unprotected intercourse.


Meemo | 3:27 AM

Please do not stop talking about your kids. I love reading about your adventures in the hood.

I sometimes have a hard time talking about my kids. People at work will ask how my baby is doing and I'm like; "oh, you know, he's getting big and he's still cute". I guess it's because I have older kids, but when my 10 and 12 year olds were babies, I did the kid talk all the time. But back then I stayed home with them so they were my whole life. This time around, I work out side of my home and that just changes everything.

Mom101 | 3:44 AM

Well dahling, that's why we have each other. Because we can secretly discuss all the details that no one else gives a flying you-know-what about. The hard part is, turning it off so we can then hit a cocktail party and talk about Prada. Or whatever the heck the cocktail party set is talking about these days. (Like we're supposed to know.)

Anna Marie | 4:39 AM

I LOOOOVE hearing about your kids. But now that I've seen Nana's garden, any chances you'd blog a little on how she achieved such beautiful results?

GUGAW | 5:07 AM

wow adorable photos!!

The Panic Room | 5:12 AM

photos are so great!

Almost all of my friends are so selfish that they never ask about LB or the baby or Cole. So it is easy for me to avoid the trap. So maybe if you had shitty friends like I did you would talk about your kids less :)

emilie | 6:02 AM

This was just the greatest post ON EARTH to read over coffee in the AM. Archer & Fable must feel the cosmic love they put out to the universe via teh interwebz. Totally made my day, so, yeah, Rebecca don't you dare shut up about those ultra-fabu-apple-cheeked-dumplings you created, because their collective overwhelming cuteness is infectious. The good kind.

Stephanie Wilson she/her @babysteph | 6:15 AM

Oh, these photos are fabulous!


Anonymous | 6:43 AM

OMG - the picture of Archer kissing Fable's hand is AMAZING!!! How sweet and perfect! I know that this post was about the Momversation - but I DON'T CARE!!!

Emery Jo | 7:06 AM

i completely agree. sometimes i have to remind myself to start exercising that brain muscle of mine again and force myself to actually WRITE. it's become a sort of discipline, whereas before it was just second nature.

angie | 7:13 AM

Um, those pic's are beautiful. Archer, kissing Fable's hand? Precious.

I think the ass shines out of my daughters ass too :) I love her. She is my world.

Unknown | 7:36 AM

Seriously, can you pictures be any freakin' cuter?!?! Holy crap, they are amazing, then again, you have those cutie patotties in there making the shot.

Yeah, I can't shut up about mine either. At the end of my aerobic classes, I always apologize for talking about my kid so much and then tell them the newest, cutest most brilliant thing my son did that week as we cool down. Secretly, I think they like... or that's what I tell myself!

Kristin | 7:39 AM

These pictures are so colorful and alive.

EdenSky | 8:11 AM

Those pictures are gorgeous. Around here the snow is still melting and Easter means mud and rain and dead brown plant skeletons.
As for kid talk, well I think that's why I blog. I have no friends with kids to chat with, so I babble to the internet just in case anyone might care, and if not, well I can keep babbling anyway. Then my mind is a little clearer for non-kid talk with real live people.

Amanda | 8:29 AM

I love talking about my kid too! I edit myself a lot when I'm around people who don't have kids - but I'm in all my glory when I'm around other parents who like to jabber as much as I do. PS those pics are BEYOND CUTE.

Kelli | 8:39 AM

That little blazer is KILLING ME!

Archer looks like a poet or something!

Hi! I've been reading your blog for awhile and I thought I would chime in.

I have a 2 1/2 year old named Ella Frances, and I have very few friends who have kids, so my rule of thumb is this:

I share stories about her that I would find funny or interesting or awesome if someone else was telling me.

So, Ella's obsession with Corduroy? Not so much. But the fact that she said "The Easter Bunny DOES work!" when she woke up that's funny.

And the thing is, I totally think you do that already on your blog!

Sarah | 8:42 AM

Heck yes! Nice shout-out to the crazy horse people. Horse bloggers are freaking nuts, and I know because I've been on the inside.

The nice thing is that whether you're talking about babies or horses or knitting or anything, there will always be people who are more than happy to listen to somebody talk passionately about what they love. Hooray!

sarah! | 9:30 AM

the headband looks so great on you! so exciting! thank you for the Eighty8 shout out :] !!!!!!!

and BEAUTIFUL pics of archer & fable. so springy and happy.


My Nana is a superstar famous garden pro who travels the world inspiring landscapes. She specializes in Southern California gardening and these pictures don't even come close to doing it justice... It's like heaven there. Gardens surrounded my ocean. Heaven.

Her website:

And book:

(She actually has several books out and a new book coming out next year.)

Laura | 9:56 AM


As a 24 year old newlywed who is also dealing with the life changing news that I'm preggo, I've found your blog invaluable. I'm not ashamed to say that I've been right back to the start and have been devouring each and every post.

Oh, and since hubs and I had first scan a week ago, I haven't been able to stop talking about our baby. And it's unborn. God help us when it gets here!

Thanks for the fabulous insight to motherhood...


TheFeministBreeder | 10:07 AM

I think you are my long-lost soul sister. I just found you through a fan of my blog. Are your initials GGC? Mine are GCC.

I too got knocked up while in the middle of my rock-n-roll twenties. I had a hard time with it. It's not easy fitting a guitar over a burgeoning belly - or losing all your friends because they don't understand that new mommies can't hang out in rock clubs until 4 am (well, not GOOD mommies anyway.)

Anyway - my blog is all about my transition from Rocker Mom to Granola chick, and all that entails.

I have to go buy a copy of your book now.

Tricina | 10:13 AM

I like the point Alice brought up, about people who don't have kids being boring too. We all talk about inane shit some of the time. As someone who doesn't have kids I'd like to say that talking about my friends' kids is way more interesting than talking about where they bought their dining room table.

Melissa | 10:41 AM

I really try not to talk too much about my kid at work. It's hard, sometimes I slip. What helps is I have a friend who talks about her dog more than I talk about my kid. And it bores me. So I really try not to bore other people unless I know they're interested or if they ask about him first. Then it's ON!

Prasti | 10:56 AM

the photos are beautiful! your children are sweet. and that garden looks lovely.

Sarah @ | 11:32 AM

Are you kidding? I *love* reading about your kids! If I didn't, I'd have stopped reading a couple years ago.

sarah | 11:48 AM

gotta say, i too love reading about your kids. and also, archer is such a cute little rockstar in training. love the corduroy jacket with the pants and the chucks!

vertigob | 11:51 AM

Oh, please don't stop talking about your children. I love the pictures and your stories.

After our children are in bed, my husband and I lay awake, sometimes for hours, talking about them. Thank goodness I have a husband that is just as love with our little ones as I am!

As much as they can make me feel crazy and overwhelmed, they are the most important project I will ever take on, I can't quit, none of can, not really. So of course, we talk about it! It is the most important relationship we have.

Samtastic | 11:52 AM

Ok these are THE cutest pictures ever. Your children are SOOOO photogenic! Gosh!!

And I'm guilty of the talking about my kid thing - but how can I help it? He is THE light of my life. :)

Ray | 12:49 PM

Well: I, for one do not mind reading about Archer and Fable all the time. I love how you write about them with such gusto; with such love. It’s the most beautiful thing ever and I enjoy reading it. So please don’t stop (of course I know you won’t =D)! I think it’s wonderful to see a mother so enthralled with her children. To not just feel the love of other mothers around me but; to also have the privilege to read about it in your blog. Thank you for writing about it.

Also: gorgeous photos of Archer and Fable in the flower garden!! Absolutely precious. What camera are you using?

RMH | 2:02 PM

Archer is Bud Cort in Harold and Maude!!!! Amazing!

Julia | 2:04 PM

I think you have two of some of the most beautiful children I have ever seen. I don't have children of my own, but love reading about your children and watching them grow.

Kelly | 2:25 PM

I agree with Kelli (and not just because she has a cool name). As someone who does not have kids, I am happy to hear some cute stories. People talk about what they spend their time doing -- if you're a parent, that's what you're doing. As Alice pointed out, though, I am not so happy to hear someone drone on about the nitty-gritty of diaper rash or especially vomiting.

I know I'm the nth person to say it, but fabulous photos.


Holy Hell, You're right RMH:


This one's even better:

mames | 4:04 PM

yay for the bud cort shout out. archer has sealed his place in my heart forever.

i feel guilty as charged with the whole kid thing. but i feel even guiltier by something that happened recently. i have a friend, once really close, now fairly distant since i had the boys. she is getting married in a few months and when we spoke recently she was very sincere with the 'missing you and our times'. which i do a little too. but she is always weird when i talk about the boys, kinda' laughing me off or just not interested at all (and I rarely talk a lot about them when we get together).

so, i asked her when she might start her family and she told me they are not planning on having kids. and i knew right then that i will likely not see her again after the wedding. not because she is not having kids, but because the way she feels about the fact that i do.

made me a little sad, but i will take my kids any day. any day.

Desiree | 4:08 PM

I agree with the rest o' them -- keep talking about those darling kids of yours. You keep talking, I'll keep talking and EVERYONE will know the glory!

Anonymous | 4:16 PM

That first picture is so adorable. I like reading about your kids.

Bellamarin | 6:13 PM

keep on talking girl, I'm listening and watching. They WILL change the world!

courtney | 6:58 PM

Definitely don't stop talking about your kids. I love their stories and seeing them through your eyes. Plus, I love talking about my kids, too. I have to fight not to bring up my daughter in every comment I leave on any post. I usually fail and mention her anyway. Like now. Heh. I loooove that series of pictures. It is SO sweet - especially that first one him kissing her hand... precious. Just precious.

Unknown | 7:39 PM

What kind of camera do you have? Your pictures are always soooo beautiful!

Sara | 7:55 PM

beautiful pictures...and some people must care because look at all your blog followers haha

Lexie Loo, Lily, Liam & Dylan Too | 9:23 PM

Beautiful pictures!
I think it's a mom rule that you have to talk about your kids 24/7. It's impossible not to!

*Tanyetta* | 9:58 PM

Don't Stop! Don't Stop! Before you know it, they'll be 21 and on their way out the nest. Yeah, ask me how I know :)

Babe in Babeland | 10:38 PM

These photos are GORGEOUS! Do you have a schnazzy camera, or is it just that beautiful?

Also, I fully agree. We should talk about our children and appreciate and reflect on their lives. I can't help but write about Sojourner, because she is such a part of my life and she amazes me daily. And as corny and cliche as it sounds, our children ARE the future!

Your children are beautiful--and so are you. Of course we want to hear more!

Gina | 10:51 PM

You talk about them all you want. I'll eat every word and photo. The sun does shine out of their asses. Well it does out of my son's anyway.

Jillian | 11:25 PM

This has nothing to do with your post...although I must say your children get more and more adorable EVERY SINGLE DAY...

Is Dana ok? It's heartbreaking!

Jude | 1:32 AM

Coming from someone who does not have kids, I don't think you should ever stop talking about your posterity. Besides the fact that they are beyond gorgeous and adorable (send the recipe for them please! -just a list of ingredients will do), they are a major part of you and your life so gloat all you want! Though I would have to say leave the diaper rash part out, lol.

I hope to have my own family some day, in the far away future; and hearing mothers like you talking about motherhood and all the pros and cons gives me hints of what is to come. I applaud you for letting your love, adoration and admiration for your kids shine through every word you put out there.

If every mom (heck, every human being!) could have half of your fabulous-ness, I think this world would be a more loving place to be.


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Natalie | 6:55 AM

O My God Rebecca, these pictures are simply glorious...and dude, I LOVE hearing about your kids, your experience as a Mom...and basically all of the things that make you, YOU!

Jackie | 7:55 AM

I swear, it's impossible. I try so hard to not to bring up my kids every five seconds in conversation - I really do make a conscious effort. But when I see the eyes of my friends start to glaze over, I know I've gone to far - I just can't help myself! What's even harder, is trying not to bring up stories/comparisons of my kids when talking to a fellow mommy. When they tell me about how excited they are about reaching a milestone,etc., I always catch myself chiming in with "Oh, that's just like the time that Abigayle..."

Not trying to echo what everyone else has said, but I'm glad that you can't stop talking about your kids - please don't stop :) That's what's wonderful about the Blog world - we can babble on about our little ones all we like - it will be read by those who care to hear our stories, and the ones who couldn't be bothered can just keep clicking their mouse til they find something of interest.

Beautiful garden, beautiful babes, beautiful post, as always! :)

mrs.notouching | 10:21 AM

Love the pictures! Before I had my own child (hmmm... like 5 weeks ago...)I was so bored with all the 'wow my baby has a grown a tooth! isn't it beautiful?!' conversations. Or the "baby alert" at work - the day stops if somebody brings their baby to work! I would drag along so not to be rude... and then cringe listening to all the "awwww... she is sooooo cute! adorable!" I remember thinking, seriously? This baby looks like Benjamin Button! And NO thank you, I do not want to hold him! But then Leila happened... and look at me now - so smitten I can't stop looking at her, talking about her or taking her pictures. It is sickening... I can't stand myself, but I can't stop it either. Sheesh... I'm actually considering another one. Anyway, keep on writing because I come here to get my daily 'fix'. Now excuse me while I go get ready to take my beautiful, adorable and the cutest baby to the office.

Alyson | 11:00 AM

Footnote #2: Rocked my world.

Meg | 11:51 AM

I absolutely love that last line that started with **

You crack my shit up.

And your kids are so adorable that I want to kiss their cheeks. Talk about them all you like.

Loukia | 1:08 PM

You are my favourite blogger ever. Seriously.

Okay and so true, all I do is talk about my kids! When before I would get passionate about other things, like world events, and politics and traveling and would do wild things, too and now I am so lame and tame and all I do is talk about my perfect and smart and funny and gorgeous children.

Your kids are awesome, too. The pictures are just fabulous. And you know what? Beign a mom is fabulous and most of the time, talking about our kids is just great! And interesting. Unless you're talking to people who don't have kids. Then they'll get bored and they just don't get it. I sometimes find my friends who don't have kids to be quite boring, actually. So there!

~denise m. | 1:25 PM

those pictures look like they came out of a fairy tale.

Jenna | 1:44 PM

Every child should have a mother who is convinced that he or she will change the world. What a fabulous way to grow up.

Jodi | 1:53 PM

Jenna, you said it perfectly! It's hard not to talk about whatever it is we are passionate about - music, cars, career and yeah, baby. But for some reason, no one complains "I wish the USC alums at work would just shut up about football". Moms get lots of flack.

But I do think it's important to find time to talk about non-baby stuff because I love books and comics and movies and music as much as the next gal. And I try very hard to at least tell stories that are interesting whether you're a mom or not.

It's not always easy when I think every single thing your kid does rocks my socks - so why shouldn't it rock everyone else's too?

Anonymous | 2:54 PM

I work at a small nonprofit and we all eat lunch together. One of my coworkers has a 9 month old baby and she talks about her constantly. I can literally see my other coworkers' eyes glaze over. I am the only other person there who has kids, and I have really started to consciously limit the kid-talk because of the reactions I see this coworker receiving.

Molly | 7:11 PM

I am going to blame the fact that you have the most gorgeous photos of your kids ever on the fact that you live in California. Where they have gorgeous gardens like that. Grrr!!!

Karen | 8:49 PM

Your this garden...looks like an English storybook...breathtaking. And Archer in that jacket? He looks like a mini-Beatle circa 1967.

Deidre | 11:14 PM

I have two older brothers who both have kids, I immigrated to Australia and even though I love talking to my neicephews on skype and talking ABOUT my neicephews, sometimes I just want to talk to my brothers about grown up things. About their lives - which i understand now are largely about the lives of their kids...oh well.

Chi Chi | 6:25 AM

Thank you for posting this! I have a friend who bombarded me with baby crap when she was pregnant. Every ultrasound, every "this week my baby is..." and I understood she was excited but I just felt smothered. Stop talking about it already! OK, you're pregnant, life goes on! Now I am pregnant with my first, due in September, and I have tried to make sure that I don't go overboard with the baby talk, because the world doesn't revolve around me and my unborn (although for me it does). I hope that when I have children, I can be like you and strike a healthy balance. You have beautiful kids and have every right to be proud. But a healthy does of respect for others never hurt anyone!

Amanda | 6:33 AM

please, please don't stop talking about your kids... I love it :)

And those pictures are absolutely priceless, the first one made me start bawling. Good start to a day :)

Queen Zucchini | 12:04 AM

I think Alice makes a really good point. People talk about what they're really into, and some people have a hard time talking about anything else. Some people are into books, music, gardening, politics, their JOBS....and others, like stay-at-home moms, are all about THEIR jobs - ergo their kids! I think the difference is that there is a social stigma that makes talking obsessively about your kids passe or annoying or what have you, where as if you talked about computer programming all the time because you worked for Microsoft people would just think "oh yeah, well she's a programmer and that's just what she's really passionate about." See what I mean? What's so wrong about having a passion and not being able to shut up about it?

Ok, that said, I totally kick myself in the butt every time I'm around other adults and find that I can't contribute to a conversation for more than 30 seconds unless it somehow reverts back to motherhood, kids, kid safety, kid learning, blah blah blah. Hanging out with my many non-parent friends is often painful because of my inability to form an intelligent thought on any other topic. I blame it on mommy hormones and mommy brain and all other physical and chemical alterations that have made me 100% mommy and 0% normal, non-breeding adult.

In the end, I tell myself it's not worth stressing about. There are enough things in my life that cause me stress...being able to talk about the things I love without feeling guilty is NOT worthy of stress!

The Johnson 5 | 6:50 AM

I think it is important to have relationships that are not ALL based on your kids.

You can be friends with another mother just because you like HER and not her kids. I have a few friends that their kids make me INSANE but I love my girlfriend.

I talk about my kids because it is AIR to me. If someone doesn't like it, well sorry for your luck, I have to hear about their nonsense and now you need to hear about how my daughter did SO UNBELIEVABLY well at the dentist, oh wait you haven't heard this one yet, well GIRL let me tell you.......

Anonymous | 11:12 AM

Listening to someone bang on about their how brilliant their kids are is about as fun as listening to someone relate the crazy dream they had the other night where the man who looked like their father, but wasn't spread peanut butter all over their naked body then sliced off pieces of their flesh to make a sandwich with, only to be interrupted by a bird carrying roast beef in its beak. Fascinating isn't it?

Designermusings | 2:27 PM

I have been reading your blog for a long time. I am not a mom, but today somehow I relate to you and your story of dreams and goals. I have been told if I want to have children, I have to do it now - for health reasons. It's been my lifelong dream and I came back from the doctor's office holding back tears and thinking "Oh shit, I've spent the last 15 years trying NOT to get pregnant, and now I need to go and DO IT." I actually called my divorced-father-of-2 fiancee and asked him what I should do first...he laughed and told me nature will take care of us and maybe I should stop twittering and just commit to blogging. I'm scared shitless.

samantha jo campen | 7:58 PM

I just love you so much.

My friend--who has a son btw--went on and on on her blog last year about FINALLY having a friend that just had a baby who DOESN'T only talk about the baby. That her life isn't only wrapped up in her child and that she is still 'the old her'.

Well, she and I are no longer friends for many reasons but this upset me a lot, as I had just had a baby myself and it was clear to me that she was talking about someone else. But you know what? Screw her because I had a baby and now that I'm a mother I AM a different person. I AM forever changed and um, hell yeah I'm going to talk about my son. Sorry if you have a problem with that. I also talk about politics and the enviornment, as well as fart jokes and People magazine. But my son? Pretty much a standard topic of conversation thankyouverymuch.

So talk away. I'm all ears.

Anonymous | 7:55 AM

I work at a law firm where many of my colleagues are guys. One of the thing I love about working with guys, beside the fact that they don't take twenty minutes trying to figure out how to divide the lunch tab the way women do is that they don't talk about their children.
They understand that much as we all love our own children we really don't care all that much about other people's kids. Yes, babies are cute and if one happens to turn up at the office I'll do the obligatory oohing and aahing but two minutes of exclaiming over the kid is plenty for me.

Anonymous | 2:11 PM

I just stumbled on your blog and love it. 29 year old mother of three and I am in MOMLAND.. I forget to talk about other things besides my kids. When I am home with them 24/7 it is all I do, breath, touch, taste, yell at. You are so write about not going there. I get asked rude questions by complete strangers, like how old were you when you started having kids, 12? Seriously. Thanks for the reality of your blog. I may not be a perfect fit to some but I am to my family.

Anonymous | 9:04 PM

Love your blog!! Love how you write and how real you are. You're real to me. I don't feel like I fit in, either. So, pls don't think you have to fit in..b/c then I wouldn't have found you. And, go ahead and talk about your kids, b/c it sounds like your life began when they began. Love your stuff, seriously.

Kim | 5:55 PM

I've lurked here occasionally, but I really wanted to post this to say that the photo of your son kissing your daughter's hand is so gorgeous! It should be framed! And? Your kids have really *really* awesome names. :)