It is beginning to look a lot like Hanukkah
After much contemplation we have decided not to celebrate Christmas in our home. I am a little bit sad because I wanted a Christmas tree, to hell with the rest of it, I just am a fan of trees with the twinkly lights. I tried to trick my old man into buying a "Hanukkah Bush" but he was not amused. My dad, backing me up, suggested "A Pagan Pine" but that also was not accepted, so there you have it folks.
Archer will be raised a Jew which means he will probably ruin Santa for the rest of the kids.
"Why, Santa? He's just a big, fat lie the gentiles tell their kids. There is no Santa!"
Just as well, I suppose. Finding out that Santa was a big, fat lie was pretty upsetting. It was Katie Anglestead who broke the news to me in 2nd grade. I was a die-hard Santa fan. I even had an elf named Pixie that Santa sent as a messenger and he would move around the house whenever I left the room. I never was able to touch him because if I did he would disappear and every year I would cry on Christmas Eve because Pixie had to leave me and go back with Santa to the North Pole. One year Pixie fell from a shelf and broke. I was shattered to learn that he was made of glass but believed that it was just his "cover." There was no turning back after Katie broke the news, explaining in detail why Santa was an impossible idea. When I found Santa's gifts in my Dad's closet I knew Katie was right. It was traumatic. Idealism hurts, yo.
My questions to GGC Readers: How did you find out that Santa was a farce? For all non-celebrating Xmas readers: How did you feel about Santa? Did he come anyway? Some of my Jewish friends had "Hanukkah Harry" which is kind of odd, but shit, whatever works. Tell me your stories, people...
Signing off on this totally Torah Tuesday!