Devil's Rejects

As many of you know, I'm obsessed with Halloween. Obsessed. Last year Archer and I went as sideshow freaks. Archer as the Illustrated Man and I: the Bearded Lady. Hal even joined our freakdom as Siamese Twins. Here's how it went down:

Archer: Illustrated Man

Tattoos: From local party store. It took two days to apply them. Slowly. Casually. Kind of like clipping finger nails or giving a toddler a haircut.
White t-shirt, sleeveless-- Gerber from Target
Iron-on letters (because I'm a sewing failure)-- Michaels
Tattoo Print Pants by Amy @ Babyfairies.
Mustache- Mom's mascara.
Black boots by: See Kai Run
Cape: from devil costume recycled from the year before.

Me: Bearded Lady

Striped Dress: From my closet.
Marching Band Jacket: priceless thrift store find from years ago.
Beard: I just gave myself a quick bang trim (gotta keep the bangs relevant, yo!) and with a little double-sided tape? Stuck those suckaz on my face.

Dad: Siamese Twins
I just taped a balloon to Hal's shoulder and drew a face. Voila!

This year I had several ideas for Archer's costume, all of which were eventually rejected sans for one which I will share for you after Halloween. Aha! Suspense! (And yes, the pirate costume featured on flickr as well as this and this blog entry was indeed a decoy... Last year we had a decoy as well. Tricky!)

Reject #1: Rocky Raccoon
Ed note: Archer's favorite song for five minutes was The Beatles' Rocky Raccoon so I was trying to work with that. So, yeah...
How it would go down: Obviously, I'd have to purchase a raccoon costume OR beg my mom to make one for me. (I'm pathetic.) Then I'd somehow have to rig Gideon's Bible to it which I never figured out... although a friend of mine did have a genius idea about Bible Belts. Turns out, they already exist. Buzzkill. Anyway! I was going to dress up as McGil, call myself Lil and wear a name tag that said "Nancy"...
Why it was rejected: Whatever. No one cares. The bible rigging thing was too much to handle and I was too bummed out about the Bible Belts.

Reject #2: Shooting Star
How it would go down: I could easily make a star costume out of cardboard and a staple gun. No problem. Then! I could give Archer a holster and a squirt gun and Voila! A shooting star!
Why it was rejected: Because the only other person who would appreciate it would be my Dad. Also, I hate weapons. Even when they squirt water.

Reject #3: Pirate of the Snails
How it would go down: Pirate costume with stuffed snails sewed all over it.
Why it was rejected: Trying to explain to strangers that "pirate of the snails" was/is Archer's original nickname would have been too much work. Also, I couldn't find suitable snails. Sigh...

Reject #4 Dreamcatcher
How it would go down: A hula hoop with beaded twine tied to either side glued to a large hat... or something.
Why it was rejected: Because "or something" is not costume engineering at its finest. Also I found that Hula hoops are too big for a toddler to wear as a costume. It would have dragged on the floor. Archer would have hated it. It wouldn't have worked out.

Reject #5: Life Coach
Ed note: this was the costume we were going with until last week's last minute change of a dress.
How it would go down: T-shirt with positive affirmations in iron-on lettering on front and back side. The spinner from The Game of Life Superglued to the front of the shirt and a hat that says "Coach"... a whistle and of course, a bag of affirmations for Archer to hand out to people. I was planning to go as Archer's "client" complete with mascara all over my face and a box of Kleenex.
Why it was rejected: I was afraid to explain it. Also, it wasn't cute enough...

...In the meantime I must haul ass to finish our costumes. The non-rejected ones. Happy Halloween to all!



merseydotes | 6:27 AM

I'm so disappointed that Petunia wanted to be Supergirl this year - we just bought a costume from the party store. Last year, I had a lot of fun making her Mary Poppins costume and people loved it! At least this year, I used my creativity for something...I'm going to be Amy Winehouse (black witch wig ratted into a beehive, lots of eyeliner, draw on beauty mark above lip, big hoop earrings, tats drawn on with washable marker, black camisole with bra showing, carry a rocks glass of iced tea to look like booze) for my office party.

Anonymous | 6:28 AM

Wow. I'm sort of embarrassed of my son's plain ol' knight costume now... But he is old enough to pick himself, so that narrows things down somewhat. Tattooed/illustrated man = genius. I love it! If I steal it and try to convince everyone to be sideshow freaks next year, will you hate me?

Badness Jones | 7:02 AM

We love Hallowe'en too, but I must say we're not nearly as inventive as you! Girlie just wants to be a princess. Can't wait to see the photos!

Anonymous | 7:31 AM

I fear those costumes would only be understood in L.A. Living in this LA., I am not sure many people would know what a life coach is. I only know, because I watch too much E!.

My son will be going as the boy who hated is costume so much that even candy doesn't make up for it. Costume bought at Party City, because his mother has no vision.

Candace April | 8:05 AM

That is so freakin' cool.

I also adore Halloween and I have to find the energy to get more creative next year.

I missed this for my post round up I put up at midnight this morning...but I added it to so I remember the cool idea.

Lori | 8:59 AM

You have the BEST ideas!

kittenpie | 1:12 PM

Okay, I'm sure what you end up with will be all fun and fabby and whatnot, but in case you decide to revisit Rocky, let me point out that bible rigging should be totally simple. You see, if you run a string between a couple of pages like a bookmark, close the book, then tie a knot snug-ly on the outside, you will end up with a bible with a nice tail of string that can be used for attaching it to stuff. Life a belt, monk-style. Or a holster of some sort, perhaps. Or a necklace, if it's not too heavy. Just a thought...

Scar | 4:49 PM

Amazing. I'm scarlett poppins. Except in a Hannah Montana wig and instead of a canary I have a talking parrot. But whatever. Mary Poppins is down. My pup is going as Boris Poppins.


Superblond-- please do! All ideas are free for the taking.

Kittenpie-- You're a lot smarter than I am. I don't know why I didn't think of that... (Duh!)

Mersey- Love the Whinehouse idea. You MUST post photos of that one. Ha!

Meemo | 2:01 AM

I love the Rocky Racoon idea. I can't wait to see what you came up with.

I actually made my son a mask this year out of paper maiche. It was my best creation ever. Okay, so it was my only creation ever but I'm proud of my craftiness anyway.