The problem, I have decided is not the "celeborexia" or "pregnorexia" or whatever it was that was linked in the comments of my last post. The issue I absolutely think is something far easier to ignore: "the professionals." The doctors. The books we read and the Internet we Google.
The pressure on pregnant women to stay thin while pregnant comes from what we are told the second we get pregnant from our doctors, newsletters and dot com destinations: Normal weight gain for a pregnant woman of average to normal weight is between 25-35 pounds.
Don't believe me? Go ahead and Google "normal weight gain for pregnant women" and see what you find.
As a woman who stands 5 foot 8 inches tall and wears a size 8, my body is about as average as it gets, and yet, 25-35 pounds is absolutely not possible for me and per your comments, not possible for most of you as well.
Which means, apparently the vast majority of women who get pregnant have "abnormal" weight gain and I don't think I'm speaking for myself when I say that no woman wants to be abnormal anything when she's pregnant.
So perhaps the problem isn't that I live in Hollywood or that the media is manipulating me into thinking I'm "fat" when my body is doing what it must in order to sustain new human life. Perhaps the problem is that some jackass doctor (obviously someone who has never been pregnant) started a rumor way back when that 25-35 pounds is "normal and healthy weight gain" for a nine-month gestation.
And to that doctor I say, "fuck you in the right nostril."
Because it just isn't true. And it isn't fair for women to go into their pregnancies fixated on the scale and then, down on themselves when they are unable to meet goals set by the medical stats they trust.
If only there was a place to send a petition to every medical website in the universe telling them that healthy weight-gain is ACTUALLY "whatever you put on while maintaining a healthy lifestyle while pregnant."
I would sign that shit like a thousand zillion times. Wouldn't you?
But I digress... Here I am, in all my 32 week, 180 pound glory, reiterating that, yes, I am proud of what my body is doing. I cannot wait to meet my daughter. And I embrace my bloated face and thick everywhere BECAUSE it means I'm creating a healthy baby girl.
Embracing my "abnormal" weight gain: 32 weeks.
Healthy-weight-gain-numbers-being-bullshit aside, I also want to reiterate this: As pregnant women we are perfectly entitled to feel like prisoners in our own bodies.
Because in a way we kinda are.
ALSO, a woman's insecurities when it comes to her weight (be it pregnancy weight or not) isn't something to be ashamed of. Or feel guilty for. It isn't something we should hide, regardless of whether we're wrestling with ten pounds or one hundred.
Confidence is sexy, sure, but so is honesty -- opening up and revealing our insecurities instead of hiding them behind affirmations full of hot air.
Because when it comes down to it? We're all looking at ourselves under the same scrutiny. And that kind of self-induced pressure needs a support group.
Thank you for being mine.