Ah, pregnancy how I miss you. The panel pants, the bloated feet, the "your baby is the size of a squash-blossom this week," the weird cravings and bladder issues, the exhaustion, the enlarged pregnancy-nose, the insomnia and constipation and inability to have sex anywhere but in dreams.
Every other night of my pregnancy with Fable I dreamt of bedding Jeremy Piven (it's crazy I do realize but secretly? I kinda find him sexy. My pregnancy with Archer I was having the same kinds of dreams about Bill Maher who I'm also crazy attracted to like whoa. Maybe because they're both cocky assholes and that was always kinda my thing don't yell at me.)
But I digress... each pregnancy is its own unique beast. With Archer it was Bill Maher and Mud Pie, with Fable it was Jeremy Piven and Fish Tacos.
I was an older, wiser woman my second pregnancy and didn't have to deal with assholes telling me that I was too young to be pregnant and/or "was I planning on marrying the father?" which was nice. Pregnancies not out of wedlock are far less dramatic then their alternative.
the week before Fable was born, looking surprisingly decent.
But by far the biggest difference between pregnancies was my weight gain and all around appearance. I was a horrific spectacle with Archer towards the end of my first pregnancy, partly because of my inability to curb my need to devour pie on a daily basis but also because of the Preeclampsia which left me swollen and bedridden for the last six weeks of my pregnancy. No fun that was at all.
After shooting the above clip(s) for Momversation I sorted through some of the video tapes of me at the end of my pregnancy with Archer and happened upon the following footage, shot hours before my induction. (I was induced the day before my due-date because of my severely high blood pressure brought on by hypertension.)
I've written a lot about my struggles with Hal and our marriage those first few months. It's not easy to marry in the second trimester of a pregnancy, to get sized for a wedding ring on a swelling finger, to consummate a marriage sober (ha!), to "honeymoon" whilst looking your absolute worst in the history of horrible but watching the above footage of Hal telling me that I was beautiful while in my most horrendous of states was/is enough to make me cry. Because regardless of the shit we were in and would continue to go through our first two years of marriage, this clip (along with the rest of the pre-delivery footage) is proof positive that Hal really, truly loved me. Despite my every flaw and fluctuation.
Either that or he was a fantastic liar.