**Updated With Winning Number, Below**
sick of belly pics, yet? because ELEVEN MORE TO GO!
I didn't have a single Braxton Hicks contraction with Archer. Not one. I had no idea what my doctor was talking about when he asked if I was feeling contractions.
"Uh, I don't think I am," I'd say, which is hilarious because when you're having contractions YOU FUCKING KNOW, and even still, it's like this "pregnant chick thing" to make it seem like we know our bodies in superhuman supernatural ways and that everything is perfect and wonderful and if I'm supposed to be contracting, well then by GOLLY! I think I might just be!
Doctor: How's the baby moving?
Patient: Oh MY GOSH, Doctor! She will NOT SIT STILL! All she does is move-move-move, kick-kick-kick. I can't believe how much she moves. Here, want to feel a kick?
I'm not talking shit. I do the exact same thing. And I annoy myself to no end because of it.
Moving on... For the last three weeks I've been having Braxton Hicks contractions HARDCORE and very often, which feel like super intense Charlie Horse(s?) in one's abdomen. Not awesome. Especially when they come frequently and with great force, oh, I dunno... every hour? At least?
So let's make lemonade, people! Let's turn my pain into your pleasure with a little contest. All you have to do is guess the following correctly:
How many awesometastic! Braxton Hicks contractions will I have today*?
(Yes, I'm serious.)
I will be calculating from morning until midnight and the two readers who guess closest will win a super cute onesie, beanie, bootie set from my good friends at DVS Shoes (who I'm sure will be thrilled when they see that I decided on a "contraction-contest" for the giveaway we discussed. Don't be mad, Rita!)
FYI, the onesies say 3-6 months but they run huge and will fit your 6-12 monther easy peasy. The booties and the hat are closer to newborn sized. For more information about DVS and their radtastic products, go here.
*I realize that this contest is totally weird and a little bit creepy but seriously? It was either "guess the contractions" or "pick a random number between 1 and 100" and how totally unoriginal is that?
WINNERS UPDATE: And the winner is... 14! Far less than usual so perhaps I should have contractions-contests EVERY DAY! Congratulations, carabee, nes, justine and quirkygirl! Please email me with your addresses (and preference of girl/boy style onesie set) and I'll mail it on ovah!
Also, let's talk baby showers for second babies... Are they tacky or fabulous?