Momma Needs a Girls Night Out... FUAAAAAW!

Okay, so I was unable to rally the peeps for 100 comments but I decided to write a GGCRapz anyway because I currently have 69 comments (snicker) and it's about quality over quantity. It has become apparent that I have some seriously word-to-the-mofo readers. (Thank you all for coming out of the woodwork and introducing yourselves.) I'm also feeling slightly uncomfortable with the "I take myself *very* seriously thankyouverymuch" vibe that's fluttering around the blogsosphere like a butterfly on Prozac. Oy to the effing vey.

Anyway, thank you for all your humorous comments and for introducing me to all of your wonderful blogs. It's good to know that a lot of you wear a size 10 shoe or larger which makes me happy because I am a 10 shoe myself and often feel alone in the world/Nordstrom shoe-sale rack.

Chag, I got some Public Enemy for you coming up next but for now, I had to go with LLCoolJ and "Mamma Needs a Girl's Night Out" to the tune of "Momma Said Knock You Out..."

*GGC Rapz Presents: Momma Needs a Girls Night Out.

Yo! Don't call in a curfew
I aint been out in a while
It's not my style
Now I got me a Chil(d)
Making a Girl grow up real fast
The pabst beer-drinking groupie shit be all in the past
From chickster to a brief stint as childbearinghipster
Tonight I gotta get out of the house, really quickster

I need a girls night out- Fuah!
Mama needs a girls night out- Uhhuah!
I need a girls night out - Pshaa!
Mama needs a girls night out- Falalala!

So my homegirl callz
She be busting my ballz
Let's rock The Wiltern and write our names in the stallz.
"Yo who's playing?"
"Yo it's a good. show."
She says, "Belle and Sebastian," my fave band so I'll go.
I dial some friends on the celly.
"Yo it's time to get wild!"
But they don't know who I am.
"Who is Girls Gone Child?"
I say, "peeps, that's my stage name. Now its time to get ill.
I've been indoors for months and its high time to chill."

"You must need a girls night out. Sha!
Mama needs a girls night out."
I need a girls night out. Huah!
Mama needs a girls night out. Huah! Huah!"

So we park at the meter and light up some pars
Then we walk in the venue and head to the bar.
My friends see me in line. "Yo! Where you been?"
I say "peeps, go to hell-y. I'm so over the scene."
I got pants that are smelly, do you know what i mean?"
We take to our seats.
Pointy shoes on our feets
"The last time I saw'em play
was in Spain on the beach."

I had a girls night out. Huah!
Mama needs girls night out (once in a while)
I had a girls night out. Huah!
Mama needs a girls night out. (once a month, maybe?)

So Yo! What's the deal? I may be a mom
but i been representin' myspace since before there was Tom.
I got an IPOD in my wagon
and mad style on my spawn.
And yeah, I like to play with building blocks on the lawn.
Sometimes I Covet Strollers
Of local high rollers
Freezing toys for the future of little man's molars.

And I need a girls night out. (again.)
Mama needs a girls night out. (tomorrow, maybe?)
I need a girls night out. (Please?)
Mama needs a girls night out...


Say word...


GGC

*Previous GGC Rapz have been added to the sidebar for all interested parties.

20 comments:

coolbeans | 3:47 AM

You are seriously hilarious. Huah!

Mega Mom | 4:33 AM

Fantastic. And to one of my all-time favorite songs. That was a great start to my day!

Mrs. Chicky | 4:35 AM

Fantastic! I think you have a new career in the works. Let us know when your new CD drops.

Word to you, Mutha.

Kristen | 4:36 AM

That's one of my favorites as well and you knock the socks off anything LL ever did.

Simply amazing.

I am in awe.

MetroDad | 6:23 AM

Dude, I didn't know you could go hard too. Way to rock the mike. You're like Ghostface Killah with a heart. Loved it.

lynsalyns | 6:26 AM

I totally needed that this morning. Thanks, GGC!!

One of these days I'll dig out my ninth-grade raps for ya.

Peace out, playa.

MrsFortune | 9:48 AM

Man, if I were in LA I'd be so there ... I'd be there YESTERDAY.

I'd like to request some NWA for the next time around? 2 Live Crew? No? :-)

Love ya.

Her Bad Mother | 10:21 AM

Word UP, yo.

The blogosphere definitely needed some of the air let out, cuz my head was gettin' set to explode from all the Heavy Thoughts.

So I thank you, and Baby thanks you, cuz now Mommy can get back to just flashing her titties.

the weirdgirl | 12:37 PM

Nice!! Love it, keep 'em up, GGC. How about some Beastie Boys, next time?

And you're right, things have been getting a bit too serious lately - in a yucky not-nice way too. (I'm about blogging for fun.)

Christina | 1:59 PM

That was awesome, and my coworkers are staring at me because I was humming the beat as I sung it in my head.

When does the Momz Rapz CD come out?

reluctant housewife | 3:46 PM

Who needs 100 comments when you've got mad skillz!

Thanks for standing up for lighthearted blogging. What's the point if it isn't fun?

Misfit Hausfrau | 5:59 PM

Those were some suhweeet rhymes. And really heartfelt. I think I need that blaring in my car...

Kristen | 7:33 PM

I LOOOVE the baby with the chain and stuff. So cute! I'm Kristen, by the way and I found you on ninepounddictator's blogroll! Come visit me!

Chag | 8:17 PM

Brilliant! But I would'nt have expected anything less. You rock the mic.

GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 10:00 AM

Thanks WG, for the rec! I'll be sure to keep Beastie Boys in mind in the future for the GGC rap.

Word to my mothers and fathers. Thanks for dancing.

Mom101 | 10:26 AM

This is so fantastic--and hey wait, maybe I can give you a girls' night out this week! Yeah.

gingajoy | 11:43 AM

i only just found your blog (via mom101). so sorry not to be able to comment, but where's the poetry in *70* anyway??

i will be stalking you again, no doubt. for if you can (snicker) over 69, then it's all it take me with me. i am dead crass like that.

GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 3:09 PM
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 3:11 PM

i'm glad i'm not the only prepubescent boy in the mix. hee hee.

Midnight | 3:06 PM

This is seriously the most hilarious thing I've read all day long.
I only hope I can have a sense of humor as good as yours when I have kids.
But for now, I think school's enough of a challenge for me.

You should get a manager.
You could probably go platinum.
:D