Posted by GIRL'S GONE CHILD | Friday, April 21, 2006
It has been a week of confessions. Psh, don't look at me, look at Jesus. He hath risen or whatever and he's taking me up with him. Seriously, you want the truth? I'm changing my tune and spilling it all.
Coming back to Jesus, (who was hospitable enough to get his homie's drunk with some water-turned-wine) last night I had an eye-opening, er, eye-closing experience with drinking. Simply put, I suck at it. I used to be able to drink a bottle of whatever and walk three flights of stairs in stacked heels. I was never one of those slurring-tit-flashing drunks. (Shhhhh. It'll ruin my image.) I wasn't a yawner. I never passed-out or puked in public. Oh, TO BE YOUNG AGAIN!
Postpartum me = extreme light-weightness or as I like to call it, Cheapos Dateosphoros Syndromamosopolis or if you do not understand ancient Greek,"Cheap Date Syndrome" which is a rather embarrassing disease.
My dehabilitating illness was proven last night after dinner with my old-roommate. One glass of cabernet later... After tripping over my barefeet several times I nearly passed out at the dinner table.
What went wrong? How did I go from proper, drinking class-act to amateur night co-ed at the K-town Kareoke joint? The huz says it's parenthood but it's got to be more than that, right? I read your blogs. I've seen your banners.
"Moms can drink a glass of wine without getting plastered"
"Not all moms"
Which is kinda true. My mom laughs at the wall's jokes after she has had cough syrup, so perhaps it's a postpartum family defect. I can't say for sure, but what I can say is that for now I'm sticking to hard-drugs. I can handle all that. Alcohol however, is way too risky.