Today I am posting in response to myself. I was going through my archives recently, searching for photos of Archer. I was nostalgic, procrastinatey, the usual, when I came upon old entries that needed some new insight, additions.
Laughter Will Get You Everywhere:
I was trying to find the below photo for this post about my Dad.
I call this Preteen Attitude and the Tye-Dye Shirt:
It pretty much says everything there is to say about father-preteen daughter relationships.
It was my father's 40th birthday and I HAD TO BE THERE which was SOOOOO LAME because like, my boyfriend was TOTALLY getting stoned like, behind 7-11 and he totally wanted me to meet him so he could like play his guitar and we could like, talk about Nirvana and soooooo good. And because I love my Dad x googolplex infinity, I wanted to give myself the opportunity to insult the "me" of the past in his defense.
Old 7th Grade me: "OMG. What is he thinking in that hippie-shirt. Tote evs, lame. Pshhhh. 1969 called and wants it's tye-die back. Duh, Irma."
New Non-grade Me: "OMG, Becca. What are you thinking in that Wet Seal uni-pantsuit. The Fugly sisters called and want to set your rose-choker-thing on fire. And by the way, uh-uh-uh. Snap.
I got your back Dad.
Placenta a Woman
My hit count has gone up significantly after this post. It's unbelievable how many people want to see Women Who Eat Their Placenta Naked or Placenta-Eating As a Hobby or Craving The Taste of Placenta and my favorite, Placenta Meat for Dinner.
Most obviously I am quite surprised that I have not been queried by Vivid Video for title usage. I mean, PEOPLE love placenta. It seems like such an obvious move.
Who You Gonna Crawl?
Apparently not me. Still not happening.
Making Mom Friends
So I think I totally blew it with my Mom friend and I'm sad and mad at myself. I totally flaked and never called her back and that was like three months ago. Fu-uck. I suck at keeping friends. Soooooo, I am officially shouting out for my local folk with kids because I want to start a un-group group, if that makes any sense. Museums? Hiking trips? Book-store browse-a-thon? Whatever. As long as you're cool and have something other than parenting to talk about, you are invited. Oh, and you must have a little one(s) I would like to make it a twice a month date-thingy. Please R.S.V.P in the comment section or email me. (see profile)
Write On: A GGC Memo:
I might have been wrong about doing it all. I am in the middle of trying to start a new manuscript. I have written three pages in four different tenses. (Didn't think it was possible? It is.) My new idea for the new "great American novel" is clouded by my obsession with scribbling future baby names. I currently have 154 names ready and am only half joking when I say I just want to retire and squat for the rest of my fertile life and drop babies one by one like a friggin machine. What the hell has happened to me? I think I'm about to cry. Stupid blog. It's all you're fault! I can't stop writing about my kid. I am obsessed with all things baby! No wonder every new parent writer writes a book about parenting, tell-all guides, children's books, BECAUSE THEY DO NOT HAVE THE MENTAL ACCESS TO WRITE ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE. AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! PLEASE HELP ME! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!