Posted by GIRL'S GONE CHILD | Friday, January 19, 2007
I wanted to quickly bring the lights up. Because after my last post and the stillness these last couple of days, there is new reason to dress up and be among friends.
Tomorrow one of my best friends gets married. And I am full of happiness for her and her husband-to-be. And I am excited to be a part of her day (and also excited that my gown is long and beautiful and hides most of my uneven and totally shitty spray-on tan... P.S. A Mystic Tan Haiku will follow in the upcoming days, I assure you.)
I have no idea what the meaning of life is or why the hell we're here, bumping into each other, falling in love, dying unexpectedly, learning, healing, puking from stomach flu, dancing on tables drunk. But it is clear to me, time and time again, that happiness and healing depends on good friends. And family. And when it comes to support and love and good people, I am a cazillionare. And sometimes it takes emotionally overwhelming weeks to really see that.
For the record I'd take a life of highs and lows over (a life of) mediums any old day.
Because finding the balance is what we are all trying to do. In love and parenthood and marriage and ourselves. And everything else that doesn't fall into one of those categories.
And so black dresses get dropped off at the dry cleaners to make way for white gowns. And although the ones we love, who have passed far too soon, will never be forgotten, neither will the overwhelming need and want to move on. To get back in the game. To be okay. To dance with best friends. In garden-weddings, under leafless trees and stars a trillion miles away.
And tomorrow we will. Tripping and punch-drunk in our golden shoes and brown matching gowns. With drinks in our hands and laughter shared. In false eyelashes, with real friends.
And so I tip my glass to those both here and passed on, the angels and the demons and the ghosts of yesterday.
Thankful to be alive.
To witness one of my favorite women in the world marry her perfect match, as her beautiful daughter trips down the isle before us.
To the coming together of old and new friends, and the strangers, too, if they promise to join me on the dance floor.
... A Life which is fucked-up and unfair and beautiful and blessed. Totally and completely blessed.