GGC Experiments: "The Mommy Movie"

There is something called the Monday Mommy Movie and as far as I know it happens in cities and counties around the country. (Perhaps maybe you, my readers will enlighten me on this.) Anyway, we have one too. The Monday Mommy Matinee. Yes, alliteration is cutesy as a cupcake. Count me in.

Our MMM is @ 11:00 at The Grove Theme Park/no you're not in Las Vegas you're on Fairfax/take a trolley from Gap to Banana Republic which is two stores away/Mall. It happens every week and women and nannies swarm the main event, strollers and picnics and toy-bags OH MY!

I had never experienced the Monday Mommy Movie until Yesterday. My neighbor and her daughter and me and Archer made a date. Rolling solo, no more. Foursome represent.

We cruised, set up camp in the theatre with our little people and waited.

Momz and our offspring, women breastfeeding infants, and some of them, full grown men. (Hmmmmm...) Some Mommies followed their crawling babies through the isles and popped Gerber snacks like popcorn. Others passed out diapers and binkies and baggies. Unfortunatley there was no flask-passing. Whatever.

There were no trailers. (My second favorite part of seeing a movie.) Why? Perhaps because the "Mommies" were not the target demo for X-Men 3, the film we were all there to see. Another reason, perhaps that the theatre was relatively empty. Either that or the ol' "It's Bret Ratner, hon, don't waste your time..." conversation, happening over breakfast the city over.

For a few minutes I was digging the scene. Archer was snacking on a granola bar, sprawled at my feet with his blankie and my wallet (his favorite toy.) But then about ten minutes into the movie the bass boomed and the blonde ken-doll looking dude grew wings and Archer got scared. Really scared. Clawing at my face scared.

The other littles seemed relatively unphased. At first I thought Archer was just overtired and being difficult but then I remembered who his mother is. Me? Ding-ding!

As a baby/child/adult I was very sensitive. A babysitter once put on monster truck racing and I screamed and cried and kicked and wailed and had nightmares for months. Her name was Tracy. Tracy the monster truck bitch with acid-washed jeans. I hated her because she watched evil television. Monster trucks were eeeeevil and so was she. I had her promptly fired.

Archer and I bailed the MMM to play "Trader Joes Shopping" instead but poor Archer didn't sleep the rest of the day. He wanted to be held and was constantly looking over his shoulder. Paranoid Boy to the max. (Blue hairy dudes can do that to a little boy. Perhaps its too early to introduce him to Cookie Monster, eh?)


In Conclusion: I should have known my offspring might carry my sensitive gene. I know now. No more Mommy movies for this duo. We're of the "play in the field" variety. Back to our solo-park missions we gooooooo.

I would, however recommend the Monday Mommy Movie Matinee for peeps with less sensitive littles and/or to Mommies with super-duper newborns/infants. Dem peeps were chillin. Those Mommies were enjoying the show, more than ten minutes of it at least.

GGC

19 comments:

Anonymous | 2:25 PM

You are a wonderful Mom to cut bait and leave with Archer.

It reminds me of the time I took my then 7, 5 and 2 year olds to see a Disney movie. It was a Pooh movie for pete's sake. My 2 year old freaked right out of his skin a third of the way through. Getting the hell out of the theater with the screaming toddler and the enraged 7 and 5 year olds was no mean feat! He had nightmares for weeks. I think, no, I am sure that was the last movie I have taken my kids to see. That's why they call me "Mean Momma"!

Bea | 2:27 PM

I used to love going to "Famous Babies" (named after the Famous Players cinema franchise where it was held). They always chose movies with less contrast between the loud and quiet so there wouldn't be sudden loud noises to scare/awaken the babies. Mostly romantic comedies, then, but it's always good to get to a movie theatre when you've got a baby.

Anonymous | 3:12 PM

My dear husband had to bail on Finding Nemo with our then two year old ('G' rated my foot)!
The same little one cried in fear at the Hellalump movie, when she was four. And finally Bambi gave her nightmares!
So needless to say we'll don't go to too many movies!

GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 3:40 PM

Wow! I have a feeling Archer will be the same way. I guess I cried at Charlotte's Web in preschool and I remember having to leave my 2nd grade class during Goonies because I was a wreck. I can see how it can be very overwhelming, especially on the big screen. Thanks for sharing your experiences, moms. The only stories I have to go by are old memories of being a little... a bit dated, I think.

Mom101 | 4:18 PM

It's called Reel Moms (get it? get it?) here and I wanted so badly to go. But I think I missed the boat on that one--I think the point is to bring your newborn who will presumably sleep and nurse through the whole thing. Not a newly shrieking 11 month old.

Hey, at least you got out. And the best thing about the Grove theater? The digdug classic arcade machine in the lobby. Yeah@!

Sandra | 4:24 PM

Its called "Movies for Mommies" here. My guy was super sensitive too and we had a similar experience. We tried another time when there was a "tamer" movie and he got right into it. His dad used to complain that I only went on movie dates with our baby instead of him.

bunmaster | 6:13 PM

Famous Babies or Stars & Strollers here. They normally turn the sound down a lot lower so if there's sudden sounds or whatever, they won't wake the babes. Only problem is that if you get a quiet movie you don't know what the hell is going on. I missed the first quarter of Brokeback Mountain because of this & then the last half because my little fusspot wanted to walk around the lobby for 45 minutes. Oh well.

Oh & she's terrified of the toilet flushing. I hope that doesn't last into potty training.

Anonymous | 6:36 PM

Um. Q is rathe sensitive as well. Miss Piggy swatting Kermit freaks her out. Needless to say, so am I (and still). Did you ever see the Dark Crystal? Jim Henson's crazy ass dark messed up puppet movie?

Well, I was so freaked out by it we had to leave in the middle (I was about 7 or so) and I had nightmares for weeks. It still gives me the eebies.

Pinterest Failures | 7:42 PM

I have always wanted to do the Mommy Matinee thing, but I had a feeling it wouldn't go well.I took Baby Girl to see Curious George for her first movie, and she FLIPPED OUT when he was flying through the air with a balloon. I should have known it wouldn't go well since she can't handle the Elmo dvd, "Lost in Grouchland." She'll be 4 in December.

jaxmom | 8:54 PM

Considering I still haven't completely recovered from seeing Goonies myself (I hear you on that one), and don't even get me started on Gremlins, this kid will probably never hit a theater. Good for you for trying it out though - you never know.

Chris | 10:08 PM

I've never been to one of these but I've always wondered: do they decrease the volume considerably for the babies?

GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 10:23 PM

No. They do not. At least not at our MMM. Bastards.

carrie | 12:20 AM

In our area they turn down the volume and up the lights, but the film selection is totally random.

I'm with you, bring an infant who could care less, or wait till they're older and see a kid-friendly movie. We took our 2 1/2 year-old daughter to see Over the Hedge, after a theater hiatus due to her inability to sit still and be quiet, and it was great!

Anonymous | 2:23 AM

We have those over here in Australia too. 'Spit The Dummy' sessions they're called. Fun name. Took my little ones once - never will again. The sound blasted through those speakers while my three year old scrambled over and under seats and ran like a maniac all through the theatre, while the four month old screamed her head off until I got the pair of them out of there quick-smart.

I'd love to go to one that had the sound lowered a little to a more kid-tolerable level, and see a movie that is semi kid-friendly at the least.

Gina | 6:59 AM

I wish we had MMM here. That is a really cool idea!

Poor Archer... now I wonder if Liam will be that way. I sure was sensitive like that as a kid.

Her Bad Mother | 9:48 AM

As Sunshine Scribe said, we have Movies for Mommies. And Cinebabies. And, according to their propaganda, they turn the volume down. But we didn't do it while WonderBaby was small and less mobile and now I doubt that she sit through it.

And? What you said. Movies terrified me when I was wee. The worst: Darby O'Gill and the Little People. Nightmares. For YEARS.

Stacy | 6:11 PM

My daughter and I tried a movie this past weekend for the first time. She's 3 and I thought she would be able to handle it. Besides, most of my friends with kids go to the movies all the time. Anyway, we bought tickets for "Over the Hedge." She seemed fine, made it through the previews, but when the movie finally came on she lost it. TERRIFIED of the big bear and the loud noises. Oh well!! I guess I know now too!

Anonymous | 11:45 PM

There have been a couple of movies I wanted to see so badly that I was tempted to do the Mommy Matinee thingy. But the noise is so damn loud I just really don't want Chance around it. It's too over-stimulating at best, scary at worst. Plus, if I want to see a movie that much I might as well get a sitter so I can enjoy it.

Archer might be fine with Cookie Monster or Grover. Chance loves them, but he also REALLY loves Bert's pigeons. It's weird what kids choose to like.

selzach | 10:13 AM

I think my town's too bass ackwards to even consider doing something as progressive as mommy matinees.

I remember my dad taking me to see The Cat From Outer Space when I was maybe 5 or so. I think we got 10 minutes into the movie and I freaked out. I was convinced the cat would be killed. My poor dad dragged my sobbing self outta there and didn't attempt another theater movie for YEARS.