Keep it on the Down-low

I have a confession to make. A secret.

Shhhh, don't tell.

After all the kicking and screaming and trying to get the pirate to bed and sneaking out of rooms and trying to sing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Arch (How I wonder, are you parched?) over and over without the squeaky voice-crack-puberty thing happening, after he finally dozes off and the house is quiet and I have the "time" I so whine about not having ALL DAY LONG to write, I kind of miss him. Like right now. Miles Davis and ceiling fans and no "cooca-cooca-cooca-eh"s to distract me and I kind of want to be distracted. Dude. Not cool. It's contrary to my whole plan.

GGC

17 comments:

Callie | 9:50 PM

Almost every night, I go check on Henry and Quinn when I go to bed. I kiss them each at least once and could stay there forever, just gazing at them in amazement.

Then one of them squirms or makes a noise, and I run out of the room thinking, "For God's sake, PLEASE don't wake up!"

Gina | 11:08 PM

What is it about missing your child when they are sleeping? You fight so hard to get their eyes closed and then 30 minutes later... I MISS MY BABY! Mother nature has done a number on us!

lynsalyns | 4:48 AM

Channing and I often lie in bed at night and have this conversation:

"I miss my Poo!"

"Me too!"

"I wish she was right here with us."

"Me too, I'd kiss her all over her face."

"I would hug on her all night long."

Then we roll over and comfortably sleep. I love my morning coffee by myself, but I also can't wait to see that tiny face smiling between the crib bars.

It's a mom thing, Momz. You got the bug bad, girlie.

Sabra | 5:19 AM

The writing sans kid thing will take a while. The first weeks I had my kiddidles gone for two mornings a week, I had on two stereos and the tv just match the noise they normally make. Goals and deadlines help. You have to get five stellar pages to me by tomorrow! ;-0

Christina | 6:00 AM

Kids are sneaky, aren't they? You want time away, and then as soon as you're apart, you want them there. It's like the best codependent relationship you'll ever have.

Her Bad Mother | 7:31 AM

(Big Fat Sympathetic Sigh)

Procrastination gets kicked up to a whole other level. A level at which the writing-procrastination can only be overcome by blogging about the child that has become the tool of procrastination, which is a whole OTHER story...

bubandpie | 7:34 AM

This is so exactly how I've been feeling lately. Like I spend all day looking for ways to escape from my babies, but as soon as they're down for the night there's that little bit of emptiness...and I think, "Tomorrow, I will be an attentive and involved mother who fully appreciates each beautiful moment she spends with her children!" It's sad, really.

Andrea | 9:32 AM

Yup. Been there. Long track record of trying to get Gabe to sleep in his own bed. LOOOONG track record. In the last week, he's slept in his own bed 4 days in a row (Hoorah!). And I miss him.

Angel Baby | 7:51 PM

God, isn't that terrible?

I'm right there with you!

Kristen | 8:32 PM

I so know what you mean. I yearn for bedtime all day long- anticipate the moment when she's down for the night, when I can relax, blog, do whatever I want. Then she goes down, and I miss her like crazy. The catch 22.

Mommy off the Record | 11:16 PM

Just think of how we're going to feel when we have to send them off to college.

I've already shed a few tears just thinking about it.

onetallmomma | 5:54 AM

I think the effect wears off the more kids you have. I remember mssing the oldest when she was asleep as a baby. By the time time I got to # 4 I was so thankful for the rare quiet moment that I could have cried! People ask me all of the time what it is like with 4. "It's LOUD!"

Tammy | 6:43 AM

Mine spend a week with their dad every month. It's crazy insane with three girls (2 teens and a six year old) and I do look forward to the peace. I actually don't wait until they leave to start missing them. How fucked up is that? I start missing them 2-3 days before they leave. On "the day", I hug and kiss them as they pile into their dad's car, walk inside and think "What am I gonna do without them for a week?"

I don't want to think about college. I really don't. But I've got a senior in high school next year and it's coming at me at breakneck speed.

Great that you enjoy being with your kids, though. Hold on to it.

sunshine scribe | 7:18 AM

I have so been there. I remember wanting to bang my head against the wall to knock some sense into myself the first time I was DISAPPOINTED he slept longer than 15 minutes.

I am so over that now though ...

Mother Bumper | 8:41 AM

shhhhh I have a secret too. When I go in the office to "get away" and leave BD with Bumper so I can write a little, I spend most of my time looking at pics and movies of Bumper. I miss her when she's not on my hip. Thanks for saying something I feel so strongly, so well.

MoMo | 1:44 PM

I know exactly what you mean. After about an hour, I start missing my son so much. It's the strangest feeling to be apart from him since we're attached all day.

But then there are nights like last night when he would not go to sleep and I would have done anything for just an hour to myself. Go figure!

Amanda Keeys | 8:56 PM

Ahhh boy do I know how that feels. I'm struggling right now with not getting my 15 mon old to sleep, but *keeping* him asleep for the night once he's gotten there. Only then, I miss him and his cheeky little face grinning at me.