I'm Serious. Where the Eff is Ashton?

I'm thinking about starting a new blog and calling it. "WHAT THE FUCK, CAR!?" I'm also checking every bush for a skirt-clad Kutcher in a trucker cap, giggling like a school boy.

Not to mention an incident last week when my passenger mirror was knocked cockeyed by a palm tree that decided to tumble down on me at a stoplight. I can see what's going on under my car. (Ground control to major Tom.) As for the huzzy's car, I'm kind of thinking we should just cut the top off and make it a convertible. Either that or maybe we need to move.

Um...Portland? Earth to Portland! Come in Portland. I want to live in you. Either that or I would like trade the Civic in for a tank.




Dude. Silver Civics. Never again. NEVER!

toyfoto | 1:10 PM

Silver. Yah. Bad juju for cars.
Hope this is the last of your car troubles.

Anonymous | 3:42 PM

Dude. Portland sounds so fucking awesome. What is with ellay hating on your vehicle??


officially my favorite blagbligbleg post of yours evah! see you in portland.

(oh, and sorry that LA is full of car jackers, assholes, penie butchers, and window breakers. okay, see you in portland. can't wait!!)

Anonymous | 4:41 PM

You mean Portland, MAINE...don't you? Maine, the State who's motto is "The way Life should be"? Come to my Portland. I can attest to the fact it that is an awesome place to raise kids.

You do like snow, don't you?

Andrea | 5:32 PM

Dude, the one and only silver car I owned was a trouble magnet too. Broke down, flat tire, among other things. I should have known it was trouble when my dad, while driving it to me, pulled a Chris Farley from Tommy Boy and bent the door backwards at the gas station. Giant hint. no more silver cars for me.

Applesass | 5:38 PM

Portland IS so fucking awesome. Close to beaches (rivers, lakes and an ocean) close to several mountains & a volcano! It was and is a great place to live and grow up. There are many super cool neighborhoods where there are lots of people walking from place to place - on purpose, not just because their car got jacked/stolen/attacked by a palm! There are lots of nearby beeutiful parks without scary nanny pimps lurking.

Come live in Portland. You might have to buy a Subaru, though, it might be a law or something. :)

Her Bad Mother | 5:40 PM

You were taken out by a PALM TREE? As a pasty Canadian, let me fully display my northern aw-shucks-ness by saying - AM IMPRESSED.

Christina | 10:39 AM

Aw, man, that SUCKS! You've had far too much bad luck with your cars. And a palm tree? OK, clearly we're not talking about just a little random crime here. When palm trees attack, it's time to get out.

Mel | 10:53 AM

Ooooooh... move to Portland! Move to Portland! All the cool people live here.

Angel Baby | 11:15 AM

Dude, if Portland listens to you after ignoring me for the last three years I will be SOOOO jealous.

We even bought a house there last year and STILL can't figure out how to get our asses moved. Every time we try someone flips the switch on the super-LA-gravity-magnet and we change our minds.

Some day this century!!

nonlineargirl | 1:28 PM

That would definitely not happen in Portland. Plus, parking is easier. (Then again, I spent most of my childhood in LA and never got smacked by a palm tree. I think you just have the luck.)

Unknown | 12:43 AM

Dude get a Ford!

Anonymous | 6:37 PM

Hey Becca..I hope all is well with you and I am sorry you wont be at the wedding but we will see you soon enough when I show again in Laguna! xo